Today is a milestone though so I figured I would update my blog on what has been going on.
I am 27 weeks pregnant as of today! Cannot believe our daughter will be here in 12 weeks (even though I think it's more like 11). Josh and I could not be happier but we are waiting patiently to meet our little girl. Yup! We are having A GIRL!!!! We are naming her Harper Jo-Mae. We got a lot of "ooh I like that name" and a lot of "why THAT name?" LOL.
Well, Harper was a name we had years ago and it is the only one that stuck considering we went through tons and tons of girl names, we didn't like any of them as much as Harper. Jo came from my grandma, her initials were JKO and I always thought Jo was cute, so yeah. Mae is the name of Josh's grandma on his dad's side and great grandma's name on his mom's side. We decided to hyphen it because Harper Jo would end up looking like her first name and I didn't want that. So, Jo-Mae is what looks and sounded best to us.
Cravings this time around include: spicy stuff, chocolate, sweet tea, chicken sandwiches, and milk.
*It is really funny because normally I do not like sweet things but apparently while pregnant I do. Also, in the beginning ANYTHING with chicken made me sick, not anymore. So bizarre. Haha.
Symptoms as of now: lower back pain, trouble sleeping - but always tired, light cramping, and a few other nasty things I would rather not share. You're welcome!
So, yup. Harper is due October 21st which is only 3 months away which is so close. We have only received a few things from friends/family which is slightly disappointing because so many people asked for us to make a registry yet not many people seem to stick to what they say. Oh well.
Things we have for her so far though(that we bought):
16 bottles (different sizes)
Bottle cleaner brush
Blankets (lost count)
Diaper bag (thanks to the hubby!)
Booties
Onesies (tons and tons)
Clothes (NB-18 months)
3 pairs of shoes
Bibs
Nursery decor
Pac n play
High chair
Stroller
Walker
Activity set
Swing/Glider
Breast pump
.......Etc. I know there is more but I cannot think of things. Haha.
Things we have received from friends/family:
Bassinet
Diapers (two boxes of size 1 so far)
Personalized car seat cover
Personalized (and remade) stroller/car seat
Personalized baby blanket
(Apparently getting a rocking chair, a camera system, and a crib but haven't gotten it yet)
Josh and I are not expecting anything from anyone. We are thankful for the things we are getting but we are aware that we are doing everything pretty much alone.
Very exciting!!!! Only 90 days left!!!!
Tuesday, July 22, 2014
Thursday, March 13, 2014
A moment of truth
On Valentine's day 2014 I told my husband that he and I would be expecting our first child in October 2014. We are thrilled. I have yet to see a doctor yet because of the crappy town I live in, we only have two doctors and one of them is not who I would considered a good doctor. So, I have to wait to see the other one. Thankfully, the month of waiting it almost over and we will be going on the 17th. We are very excited and cannot wait to see the little peanut.
I am currently 7 weeks and 6 days pregnant according to all the due date calculators I found on Google. I will find out how far along I really am when I see the doctor. As of right now, pregnancy is not agreeing with me. I am sick pretty much all day. My stomach hurts all day and I feel as though I have been on a roller coaster. Food is not really appealing and the foods that are appealing are horrible for me. I can't keep much down, which sucks.
My mood has been a pain as well. I feel as though I am about to scream all the time. It is awful. I feel horrible for my husband. He is waiting on me hand and foot when he is home and I find stupid crap to bitch about. Poor guy. I barely sleep through the night because I either feel sick or I have to pee. It SUCKS.
I have been pregnant twice before and those ended in miscarriage, sadly. We stopped trying for awhile and I spent over a year not pregnant or getting pregnant which was nice. I needed the break for my body and mind. However, I did tell my husband that if this pregnancy ends in miscarriage as well, then I am 3 for 3 and I am done with getting pregnant. I do not understand how women do this to their bodies and their minds. It could drive a person crazy. I do not feel like myself. I want so badly to be happy about being pregnant and be able to experience all the happy stuff that women seem to go through but for some reason, my body is not happy right now. I know it will get better over time and obviously will be amazing once we have a child but right now, that light at the end of the tunnel is hard to see.
I am staying positive though.
I am currently 7 weeks and 6 days pregnant according to all the due date calculators I found on Google. I will find out how far along I really am when I see the doctor. As of right now, pregnancy is not agreeing with me. I am sick pretty much all day. My stomach hurts all day and I feel as though I have been on a roller coaster. Food is not really appealing and the foods that are appealing are horrible for me. I can't keep much down, which sucks.
My mood has been a pain as well. I feel as though I am about to scream all the time. It is awful. I feel horrible for my husband. He is waiting on me hand and foot when he is home and I find stupid crap to bitch about. Poor guy. I barely sleep through the night because I either feel sick or I have to pee. It SUCKS.
I have been pregnant twice before and those ended in miscarriage, sadly. We stopped trying for awhile and I spent over a year not pregnant or getting pregnant which was nice. I needed the break for my body and mind. However, I did tell my husband that if this pregnancy ends in miscarriage as well, then I am 3 for 3 and I am done with getting pregnant. I do not understand how women do this to their bodies and their minds. It could drive a person crazy. I do not feel like myself. I want so badly to be happy about being pregnant and be able to experience all the happy stuff that women seem to go through but for some reason, my body is not happy right now. I know it will get better over time and obviously will be amazing once we have a child but right now, that light at the end of the tunnel is hard to see.
I am staying positive though.
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
Too early for this shit
If you think I'm spoiled rotten, you're correct...I am. But don't even think about throwing it in my face like it's a bad thing or something I should feel guilty about. Just because you made fucked up choices in your life and allowed men to walk all over you, doesnt give you the right to get on my ass for being smart. I love my life and appreciate everything I've been given. You have a problem with how I live, feel free to walk out of my life and close the door. I don't chase people. Choice is yours.
Friday, November 29, 2013
Spoiled brats
Every now and then, I get really annoyed and upset over little things that really should not matter. Most of the time, I get mad at my husband because of these little things. I am 24 and basically married, not married on paper just yet meaning we don't have the JOP thing but in Texas, we are married. We struggle from time to time with money and everything else. I see friends in relationships who brag about getting flowers, going out to dinner, always doing something with their partners and it usually drives me nuts. I have realized that getting upset over things like this is ridiculous and I am aware that I should not care what other couples are doing. However, I know that in the beginning of relationships, everything is happy and perfect but after a while, it dies down. It is normal.
Also, Josh and I have had to do things for ourselves for quite sometime. He was kicked out of his parents' house at age 18 and was told to pay for his rent and everything most people don't worry about till their mid-late 20s. He has been working since age 15 and paying for his own stuff since. I moved out of my mom's house when I was 21 and I have been paying for my own stuff since age 18. We never had the luxury of having our parents do everything for us.
Josh and I have talked about other couples in the past and wonder how the hell they can afford to spoil each other constantly and knowing they make less money than Josh does. Truth is, most people our age still live with mommy and daddy and have nothing to spend their money on but themselves. Must be nice. Everything we have, we have worked for.
We even discussed that when we have children, we don't get to have a huge party with people buying us shit. Same when we get married. We don't get any of that crap. Not that people who have it should feel bad for us but it's almost sad because they don't know what struggle is, they can easily depend on someone in their family to help them. Josh nor I have that option.
With all that said, I have realized that even though it really sucks not being able to suck on the tit of my parents for shit….there is a great sense of accomplishment knowing we don't need our family to make things happen for us. Josh might not buy me flowers all the time but we have a badass house, two tvs, four dogs, a cat, and a truck that runs. We pay for EVERYTHING we have with NO help.
I feel bad for those who are so used to having help…when their family dies, they are going to have a really hard time doing things for themselves.
Best of luck to the spoiled brats in the world.
Also, Josh and I have had to do things for ourselves for quite sometime. He was kicked out of his parents' house at age 18 and was told to pay for his rent and everything most people don't worry about till their mid-late 20s. He has been working since age 15 and paying for his own stuff since. I moved out of my mom's house when I was 21 and I have been paying for my own stuff since age 18. We never had the luxury of having our parents do everything for us.
Josh and I have talked about other couples in the past and wonder how the hell they can afford to spoil each other constantly and knowing they make less money than Josh does. Truth is, most people our age still live with mommy and daddy and have nothing to spend their money on but themselves. Must be nice. Everything we have, we have worked for.
We even discussed that when we have children, we don't get to have a huge party with people buying us shit. Same when we get married. We don't get any of that crap. Not that people who have it should feel bad for us but it's almost sad because they don't know what struggle is, they can easily depend on someone in their family to help them. Josh nor I have that option.
With all that said, I have realized that even though it really sucks not being able to suck on the tit of my parents for shit….there is a great sense of accomplishment knowing we don't need our family to make things happen for us. Josh might not buy me flowers all the time but we have a badass house, two tvs, four dogs, a cat, and a truck that runs. We pay for EVERYTHING we have with NO help.
I feel bad for those who are so used to having help…when their family dies, they are going to have a really hard time doing things for themselves.
Best of luck to the spoiled brats in the world.
Saturday, November 16, 2013
The Walking Dead is a dud
I have been wanting to write a blog about this show for quite awhile but never got around to it. Over a year ago, I was told the show was available on Netflix to watch so I figured, what the heck? So, I curled up on the couch and started season 1 and after about 10 minutes, I wanted to turn it off. Why? You might ask. Well, the answer is simple, it is fake. Duh, right? When I say fake, I don't mean the obvious part that it is a show but the story line. But, my friend told me to keep watching and I would not be disappointed because it was going to "get good". In my opinion, that was when I stopped believing him.
The hours passed and I continued to force myself to watch the entire first season, I even watched about four or five episodes into season two. As the first season went on all I could think is WTF am I watching and not in a good way. I never understood the story line. Still don't.
Here are my issues with this show.
Why did the zombies move slowly in the beginning but by the end of season one and almost all of season two…they somehow run now? When and WHY did this happen?
Why is their blood red?
How did all of them get the strength to get up once they were bit, died, and then came back undead?
While in the underground lab…the scientist clearly states that the frontal lobe has been destroyed. Well, I have a degree in psychology and IF that were true in their storyline…their movement would be compromised. For those who do not understand that…the walkers would not be able to move much if at all and they sure as hell would NOT be able to lift their body in any way. Meaning reaching for people, stepping onto an RV (HORRIBLE scene), or anything of that nature. It would not be possible.
In season two…a few "walkers" in the woods actually jump…clearly showing they are actors. WTF?
How is it that they would hide under cars and the walkers just walked around them. Yet, when in a house or something, they can "smell" or "hear" the living. Doesn't make any sense.
Those are just SOME of the issues I have with this show…which is why I completely stopped watching it for over a year until my husband decided he wanted to try it out so I figured I would give it another shot. And while watching it with him, he was asking the questions I had been asking myself in the past. So, I know it's not just me not enjoying the show or "having a lack of imagination"…thats the issue for me….there is no imagination. I cannot watch a show that does not answer it's own questions that are so obvious.
Obviously most people who watch and enjoy the show are those who really love zombies and I can understand that. However, anyone who is a FAN of zombies will know that this show is just embarrassing.
Now, the characters are interesting KIND OF. I have a huge problem with the wife and I think she is a whore. Regardless if she thought her husband was dead or not, she could have waited more than a month to start fucking (excuse the langauge) her husband's best friend. The best friend is a douche bag would lied to get at the wife and he is a killer. To be honest, the rest of the characters are expendable.
If you have seen the show, feel free to try and argue with me or say I am wrong, etc. I realize the show is for entertainment purposes….go figure. And in someways, it is entertaining. However, for a show that is meant to be happening now and be realistic….they should have realized how stupid the writing is. OR…..the writers are thinking that people are stupid and wouldn't notice these things. Either way, it's sad because had they thought more about the simple things, this show could have been really really good.
The hours passed and I continued to force myself to watch the entire first season, I even watched about four or five episodes into season two. As the first season went on all I could think is WTF am I watching and not in a good way. I never understood the story line. Still don't.
Here are my issues with this show.
Why did the zombies move slowly in the beginning but by the end of season one and almost all of season two…they somehow run now? When and WHY did this happen?
Why is their blood red?
How did all of them get the strength to get up once they were bit, died, and then came back undead?
While in the underground lab…the scientist clearly states that the frontal lobe has been destroyed. Well, I have a degree in psychology and IF that were true in their storyline…their movement would be compromised. For those who do not understand that…the walkers would not be able to move much if at all and they sure as hell would NOT be able to lift their body in any way. Meaning reaching for people, stepping onto an RV (HORRIBLE scene), or anything of that nature. It would not be possible.
In season two…a few "walkers" in the woods actually jump…clearly showing they are actors. WTF?
How is it that they would hide under cars and the walkers just walked around them. Yet, when in a house or something, they can "smell" or "hear" the living. Doesn't make any sense.
Those are just SOME of the issues I have with this show…which is why I completely stopped watching it for over a year until my husband decided he wanted to try it out so I figured I would give it another shot. And while watching it with him, he was asking the questions I had been asking myself in the past. So, I know it's not just me not enjoying the show or "having a lack of imagination"…thats the issue for me….there is no imagination. I cannot watch a show that does not answer it's own questions that are so obvious.
Obviously most people who watch and enjoy the show are those who really love zombies and I can understand that. However, anyone who is a FAN of zombies will know that this show is just embarrassing.
Now, the characters are interesting KIND OF. I have a huge problem with the wife and I think she is a whore. Regardless if she thought her husband was dead or not, she could have waited more than a month to start fucking (excuse the langauge) her husband's best friend. The best friend is a douche bag would lied to get at the wife and he is a killer. To be honest, the rest of the characters are expendable.
If you have seen the show, feel free to try and argue with me or say I am wrong, etc. I realize the show is for entertainment purposes….go figure. And in someways, it is entertaining. However, for a show that is meant to be happening now and be realistic….they should have realized how stupid the writing is. OR…..the writers are thinking that people are stupid and wouldn't notice these things. Either way, it's sad because had they thought more about the simple things, this show could have been really really good.
Friday, November 8, 2013
Fake ass relationships
"I am so in love"
"Never been with a guy who loves this like a do"
"He is the best sex I have ever had"
"He is so big. hehe"
"My ex is nothing to compared to my new boyfriend"
Those are just some of the things I have seen people say when they get into a new relationship. Every time I see it, I just laugh at how stupid people are. Girls lie 80% of the time when they say a guy is "big", seriously….it is true. Now, yes some guys are gifted and they deserve to be bragged about…however, if a girl has said it about every boyfriend she has had…she is a fucking liar. Not that many guys are THAT above average.
New relationships are a fun time and I am not talking away from that but get the fuck out of here with that "he is amazing" bullshit. You know damn well that in a year or two, you are going to be saying the same thing about some new poor fool. The first few months everything is all rainbows and candy corn which I get, I have been there…in high school. I remember every time I got into a relationship it was "amazing" because the guy is so sweet. Enjoy it while you think it lasts.
I have been with my guy over 2 years which is not a long time at all. My longest relationship was 4 years and thats when I was 16-20. However I am now 24 and have learned a shit load after being in relationships. As angry and bitter as it may sound, I no longer believe in fairy tales. The exist in story books, thats it. When my guy and I got together he was the most romantic guy and was the only guy I have ever been with who was actually WANTING to do things to make me happy. When I moved to Texas to be with him (after 3 months of knowing him) we fought ALL the time. Literally….ALL the time. It was borderline abusive because we have such stronger personalities. Oddly enough it worked out for sure because we are still together and in love. Go figure.
I learned that pretending a relationship is better than it is makes no sense and all it does is makes you look like an idiot to smart people (such as myself) who can see through your bullshit. Being in love all the time is just annoying. If you always think you are in it, how are you going to know when you actually find it? Not everything has to be rainbows and sunshine in order to find love or to actually be in love. I am thankful for my relationship with my guy even if it doesn't last. He is a relationship that I will remember because he taught me things and didn't bullshit me like every other guy did.
Love is something you learn, it is not something that just happens.
You'll realize this when you grow up and get out of the "everything is perfect" mindset because you know in a few months your relationship will go to shit and you'll be talking shit about him like you did your last ex. If you think you are grown up enough to be in love, be grown up enough to realize the difference.
"Never been with a guy who loves this like a do"
"He is the best sex I have ever had"
"He is so big. hehe"
"My ex is nothing to compared to my new boyfriend"
Those are just some of the things I have seen people say when they get into a new relationship. Every time I see it, I just laugh at how stupid people are. Girls lie 80% of the time when they say a guy is "big", seriously….it is true. Now, yes some guys are gifted and they deserve to be bragged about…however, if a girl has said it about every boyfriend she has had…she is a fucking liar. Not that many guys are THAT above average.
New relationships are a fun time and I am not talking away from that but get the fuck out of here with that "he is amazing" bullshit. You know damn well that in a year or two, you are going to be saying the same thing about some new poor fool. The first few months everything is all rainbows and candy corn which I get, I have been there…in high school. I remember every time I got into a relationship it was "amazing" because the guy is so sweet. Enjoy it while you think it lasts.
I have been with my guy over 2 years which is not a long time at all. My longest relationship was 4 years and thats when I was 16-20. However I am now 24 and have learned a shit load after being in relationships. As angry and bitter as it may sound, I no longer believe in fairy tales. The exist in story books, thats it. When my guy and I got together he was the most romantic guy and was the only guy I have ever been with who was actually WANTING to do things to make me happy. When I moved to Texas to be with him (after 3 months of knowing him) we fought ALL the time. Literally….ALL the time. It was borderline abusive because we have such stronger personalities. Oddly enough it worked out for sure because we are still together and in love. Go figure.
I learned that pretending a relationship is better than it is makes no sense and all it does is makes you look like an idiot to smart people (such as myself) who can see through your bullshit. Being in love all the time is just annoying. If you always think you are in it, how are you going to know when you actually find it? Not everything has to be rainbows and sunshine in order to find love or to actually be in love. I am thankful for my relationship with my guy even if it doesn't last. He is a relationship that I will remember because he taught me things and didn't bullshit me like every other guy did.
Love is something you learn, it is not something that just happens.
You'll realize this when you grow up and get out of the "everything is perfect" mindset because you know in a few months your relationship will go to shit and you'll be talking shit about him like you did your last ex. If you think you are grown up enough to be in love, be grown up enough to realize the difference.
Monday, October 21, 2013
Sister Wives
For those who have not seen the show it is about a man (Kody) and he is the husband, he has four (yes...4 wives). Meri is the one he married first, then Janelle, then Christine, and then Robyn. They are one big family and each wife had kids with Kody. Robyn had three children from a pervious marriage and last year she and Kody had their first child together; a son.
If you get a chance, check out the show..it is really interesting and I really enjoy it. I had heard about it years ago but was not interested in it and was very confused by that life style, but what do you do when you are confused about something? I don't know about you, but I research things and try to find out as much information as I can about the things I don't understand. Obviously their lifestyle is not the "normal" but really? What is nowadays?
The family now has a total of 18 children and yeah, that is pretty crazy as one would imagine. I cannot even imagine having that many children but it is awesome how well they handle everything. It really is awesome. They are one big family and every child has four moms which would seem a bit odd but it is amazing that they all have so much love for one another.
Obviously there would be jealousy and especially towards the newest wife (Robyn) because she tends to be the favorite or at least in my opinion. She and Kody seem to have a different bond than the rest of the wives and yet there is a strong bond between Meri and Kody as well. Meri is Kody's first wife and I think that is natural to have a strong bond. Meri and Robyn are the closest out of the sisters and tend to have a much stronger and loving bond than Janelle and Christine.
Christine is my favorite, I think. The way she handles things is very much my style and I think I relate the most with her. That is what's so awesome about the show...you get to see one man married to four different women who have different parenting styles and personalities. To me, that much be a crazy life but somehow it just works for them.
Some people have very strong opinions on their family and that it is "wrong" but I find it odd that people are so quick to judge everything. I do not understand why people have to concern themselves with another person's life. If no one is being harmed, who cares? They are happy and I think it is pretty awesome that even with all the stresses, they can all be smart, independent, and all around good people.
While watching the show, I wondered what it would be like if Joshua told me he wanted another wife. Part of me feels as though I would be okay with it because once we have kids, they will have a big family which is something I never had. I love my alone time but I am sure I would be jealous but over time, I think eventually you become close to the sister wives and that could be great support. I don't know, I think that life style is definitely different.
If you get a chance, check out the show..it is really interesting and I really enjoy it. I had heard about it years ago but was not interested in it and was very confused by that life style, but what do you do when you are confused about something? I don't know about you, but I research things and try to find out as much information as I can about the things I don't understand. Obviously their lifestyle is not the "normal" but really? What is nowadays?
The family now has a total of 18 children and yeah, that is pretty crazy as one would imagine. I cannot even imagine having that many children but it is awesome how well they handle everything. It really is awesome. They are one big family and every child has four moms which would seem a bit odd but it is amazing that they all have so much love for one another.
Obviously there would be jealousy and especially towards the newest wife (Robyn) because she tends to be the favorite or at least in my opinion. She and Kody seem to have a different bond than the rest of the wives and yet there is a strong bond between Meri and Kody as well. Meri is Kody's first wife and I think that is natural to have a strong bond. Meri and Robyn are the closest out of the sisters and tend to have a much stronger and loving bond than Janelle and Christine.
Christine is my favorite, I think. The way she handles things is very much my style and I think I relate the most with her. That is what's so awesome about the show...you get to see one man married to four different women who have different parenting styles and personalities. To me, that much be a crazy life but somehow it just works for them.
Some people have very strong opinions on their family and that it is "wrong" but I find it odd that people are so quick to judge everything. I do not understand why people have to concern themselves with another person's life. If no one is being harmed, who cares? They are happy and I think it is pretty awesome that even with all the stresses, they can all be smart, independent, and all around good people.
While watching the show, I wondered what it would be like if Joshua told me he wanted another wife. Part of me feels as though I would be okay with it because once we have kids, they will have a big family which is something I never had. I love my alone time but I am sure I would be jealous but over time, I think eventually you become close to the sister wives and that could be great support. I don't know, I think that life style is definitely different.
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